“Taming Toxic People – the science of identifying & dealing with psychopaths at work & at home” is a must-read for everybody living in western society. My husband and I were so impressed that we have both the electronic version and the hard copy of the book which we will use as a reference for business and home for many years to come. With this valuable resource we feel confidently armed and able to protect our business, our staff and our family from toxic people.
These are 7 lessons learned whilst reading and discussing David Gillespie’s riveting book titled, “Taming Toxic People – the science of identifying & dealing with psychopaths at work & at home”.
1. They Lurk Among Us
Forget the image of a sex crazed knife wielding serial killer, psychopaths are much more subtle and live among us. According to Gillespie, everyone knows at least 1 psychopath. Therefore everyone needs to read the book, unless they’re a psychopath, of course. Once you read the book you’ll start to identify people in your life, past and present, who are psychopaths. It’s quite surprising how many psychopaths we encounter throughout our lives. Off the top of my head I know I’ve encountered corporate psychopath bosses, engaged psychopath professional consultants, worked with psychopath colleagues, employed psychopath staff and dated a psychopath boyfriend. Thank God I didn’t marry or have children with him! As the book title suggests, Gillespie offers sage advice on how to identify and deal with the psychopaths in your life. If you think you’ve never come across a psychopath, think again. Get the book.
2. Psychopaths Cry. Legitimately.
Who‘d have thought that a psychopath would cry? You’d think, crocodile tears likely but In “Taming Toxic People”, Gillespie generously explains the difference between feelings and emotions. Emotions are primitive responses hard wired into our pre-human brain. Feelings on the other hand are a more advanced evolution in our species and psychopaths are missing that part of the brain. Psychopaths have no feelings.
3. Psychopaths Have No Empathy
According to Gillespie, a person either has empathy or does not. Often psychopaths can feign empathy and mirror others but they don’t actually feel empathy. Ever. According to Gillespie someone is either a psychopath or they’re not.
4. They Have No Fear. Reward is the Only Motivator for Psychopaths
This could be the scariest revelation of all. If psychopaths have no fear then there is no way to punish them. Like a hungry pit bull unleashed, psychopaths, will go after the reward at all costs. It doesn’t matter what damage they do in the process. This is particularly bad news for corporations who employ psychopaths at the highest levels as according to Gillespie, the corporations rarely recover from the damage a psychopath does.
5. Serial Bullies are Psychopaths
Gillespie’s research demonstrates that serial bullies are psychopaths. Employees can expect to be bullied by a “normal manager” every six weeks but if your manager is a psychopath you can expect to be bullied once or twice per week. Not great news for corporations as sick leave sky rockets.
6. I misdiagnosed Psychopaths as Malignant Narcissists for years
Whilst reading “Taming Toxic People” I realised that alot of those bullies I had previously thought to be malignant narcissists or sociopaths are actually psychopaths. Perhaps due to a combination of empathy , ignorance and the naive illusion that most psychopaths are in jail, many of us are deluded.
7. They Lure Victims via Social Media
The introduction of social media to the masses in 2010 has been the biggest coup for psychopaths. It gives convincing charmers a nightmarishly easy way to stalk their prey and groom them so that the victim feels confident when they meet up in real life. Psychopaths post self aggrandising propaganda for their victims to see whilst being able to stealthily find out vital information on the victim which will be used in manipulations.
Watch a Psychopath Interviewed
If you’re interested to see a psychopath in action then check out acclaimed criminologist, Professor David Wilson’s gripping documentary, “Interview with a murderer”, where you can watch the stark difference between the behaviour of the convicted murderer, Bert Spencer, and other ordinary folk including the Professor.
PHOTO: INTERVIEW WITH A MURDERER
Bert Spencer and Criminologist, Professor David Wilcox
David Gillespie has done a tremendous service to the general public in writing this book. Let’s nominate him for Australian of the Year!
You can BUY “Taming Toxic People” here
You can find out more about David Gillespie here
You can see David Gillespie’s interview with ABC’s Lateline here
You can listen to the Mamamia Podcast Ep.105 David Gillespie Knows How to Spot a Psychopath here
Take the quizz here